How important does a person have to be before they are considered
assassinated instead of just murdered ?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. but it's only a "penny
for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to ?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were
buried in for eternity ?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box ?
What disease did cured ham actually have ?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would
be a good idea to put wheels on luggage ?
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up
like every two hours ?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing ?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV ?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in
binoculars to look at things on the ground ?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see
you naked anyway.
Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural ?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a
horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat ?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him ?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a
coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat ?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're
both dogs !
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why
didn't he just buy dinner ?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, what is baby oil made from ?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons ?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune ?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above ?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but
call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass ?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at
you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the
window ?
Do you ever wonder why you gave me your e-mail address in the first place ?
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